Not so fast

So, Jack and I just completed a two-day fast. We drank a lot of water with lemon and honey, and had nibbles of trail mix every now and then. I'm feeling pretty energized this morning, but the cleanse continues, with nutritional drinks in the morning and night, and larger, balanced lunches during the day. We're really trying to take advantage of this time that's been given to us while the tour gets re-routed. We're moving at a slower, summer-time pace and trying to get back in complete balance. Had a great couple of days on the bimah this weekend. Not teaching and lots of rest has given me vocal fuel to burn, it seems.

Only me

I know that most of you who are reading this blog are awaiting Gracie's next post with baited breath. However, it's only me right now. I can't seem to get her to sit still to dictate to me her actual Hollywood Bowl experiences, although at dinner last night she gave us a pretty good play by play of the thing which was quite interesting. You'll see.

We're back from a few days on a cruise. It took a few days back on land for me to feel like my house was not slowly listing back and forth. But my land legs seem to have taken today.

We're still coming down from the Event. Wow. VGL is in the process of restructuring the tour. Should be interesting to see what they do!

Rehearsal and Fear - by Gracie

Hello. I'm Cindy's daughter, Gracie. She has been talking about me in this website. I want to talk to you about the night when I was really scared and I didn't know if I would go to the Hollywood Bowl and sing, or just give up my career and leave it. So, one afternoon when me and Mom were having a little date, we were talking about how good I would be at the Hollywood Bowl. But, then I suddenly realized that if I would go to the Hollywood Bowl I would be pretty shy, but if I didn't, I would be pretty jealous about that because I really want to sing and do a career, and another person might sing if I don't. So I was whining at my Mom, and she was like, "Stop whining," and I was like, "But I don't know what to do for the Hollywood Bowl! I could either do it or not do it. But I don't know!" And my Mom said, "I know, it's a hard choice!" While I ate some chicken and potatoes my Mom was responding. And she said, "You're tired, I know that!" and I'm like, "I'm not tired! Can I have some ice cream? Because it makes me really feel better when I have some ice cream." And my Mom says, "Sure! But I don't think we have ice cream." So I said, "Uh oh, I'm still scared Mom. I don't know." So my Mom said, "Well then don't do it, honey, if you don't want to. I mean really. Your Dad said he could get another singer if you say no, or if you say yes, it's perfectly fine." "But I don't know what I should do! I mean, it may be a big girl thing, but I'm also shy about it, and I'll be pretty jealous of another girl singing that part!"

A few months passed. And then I was on my way to Irvine for rehearsals, and I said again, "I'm scared Mom. I don't want to go to the Hollywood Bowl." "Again?" "Yes, again! I keep saying Yes! No! Yes! No! It's a hard choice!" So I was totally scared and I was kind of shaking. "I know, but honey, really! You don't have to sing tonight if you don't want to." But then the day was getting to be the afternoon. Then I realized that I did have to sing that night. They had to sound check me. Then I was really scared.

So I went to my Mom and I said, "Mom, you didn't tell me that!" "Well, I didn't know!" Then I did the sound check thing, and it was fine. Then it was nighttime and I felt something really weird in my stomach. And I was sniffling. And my feet hurt. And I was like, "Uh oh. I'm sick." How am I going to sing at the Hollywood Bowl when I'm sick? "On no! Mom? I'm sick!" "Oh sweetie, I'm really sorry about that."

The next day I was sick so I was lying down in my Dad's office and I couldn't really sing. My throat was too weird to sing. So what I had to do was get a little rest. But when I woke up my throat was all meshugina and full of frogs. Then it was my turn to go sing. And I said, "On no. I'll sound horrible." Then I did it, but I sounded a little croaky.

The next day I didn't sing at all. I was totally awake. My Mom gave me some tea and some Sprite because I had a fever. So I was just resting. Feeling a little sad. I put my head against my shirt as a pillow and I had a jacket as a blanket. And I started to fall asleep. And I could hear voices in my mind that said, "You'll do well, Gracie."

Photos -- finally!

Here are some photos of us rehearsing at the Verizon Amphitheater in
Irvine, CA - 7/1/05.


Gracie rehearsing. Cool, no?


Conductor Mark Watters, Jack - seated, and orchestrator and good friend David Kates.



Our wonderful director Dori Sanchez, and Gracie.



Jack and Gracie in the production offices.



Laurie Robinson and me. She was a wonderful person to get to know throughout this process. My new partner in crime!



Laurie and me rehearsing.

Sifting

Trying to make sense of the show now, and all of the ensuing commentary. There is my opinion, and then, 11000 others. My body is starting to function properly again. That's good news. Jack and I are doing well, and my relationship with my daughter is improving as well. It's the process.

Afterglow

Well, we did it. I can't quite believe that we did it, but we did it. The evening was amazing. An incredible calm overtook me as I got into the hair and makeup chair. I just internally wound myself all the way down. I felt better when I wasn't back in the dressing rooms waiting for my cue, but preferred to watch the whole show from the wings with Gracie. Being on stage felt like coming home. I loved every minute of it. All of the pieces went well for me, although I still did not make my Myst entrance correctly (must be some kind of mental block) but compensated quickly for it. Gracie was a joy on stage, and I think this experience will set her life on an interesting course. How many eight-year-olds get to make their debut at the Hollywood Bowl with the Los Angeles Philharmonic?

To any friends or family who may be reading this blog, I thank you all so much for your support and encouragement. I was nearly crippled with fear going into this, but everyone just kept nudging me along, until I had to do all the final nudging (well, and heavy lifting) for myself. Without that head of steam, I don't think I could have chugged up that mountain. My sister in particular was very helpful in those last minutes before curtain. Jack and Tommy were -- well, beyond words. How did they pull this enormous event off? My husband is my hero!

Jiggety Jog

Well, we're home now, and have been for a day and a half. We all were completely down yesterday. Gracie has a sinus infection that she's nursing, and Jack was past the point of exhaustion. I felt under the weather, so we all huddled around the TiVO and slept most of the day. Today we're all feeling revived and alive.

I spent the better part of this morning going through my phone book and calling friends and family across the country to let them know when we're going to be in their part of the country. It was great calling old friends whom I haven't seen in years, and reconnecting with them. I'm so excited for my family to come to the show.

Tomorrow the show is loaded into the Bowl, and Laurie and I have makeup consultations. Wednesday morning we have a rehearsal with the Phil. I'm going to go under hypnosis in the early afternoon, I hope. I need to just keep calm. Then... the show!

I lost around seven pounds in the last week just being nervous, which probably has adjusted my metabolism. Altogether, not a bad thing!

Birthday. Take a ch- ch- ch- chance.

Which I'm doing. Even with all of the support and kudos, I don't mind telling you that I'm a nervous wreck, beginning my day with a celebratory birthday throw-up. Lovely. We're going into a full rehearsal tonight, and I'm just trying to remain as calm as possible. Martin, the "Video Games Pianist" and boy genious who condensed an orchestral piece for piano and soprano and alto showed up a while ago while I was practicing our piece. Of course, the guy has perfect pitch, so I could quickly check with him to see if I was on. I think the piece has been successfully burned into my synapses, because I was on key and tempo, just pacing around backstage practicing.

Gracie has some kind of virus, poor thing. She is still languishing today on the couch in the production offices. One of the guys on the VGL crew has a PSP which he let her borrow. I see a PSP in our near future.

Jack is calm, and remembered my birthday, even in the midst of the chaos of his producing this show. I'm wearing a beautiful necklace at the moment. Gracie is even trying to be less contrary in honor of my birthday.

Well, I couldn't stop my birthday from arriving, and I can't stop the march of time toward the opening of the show. Why am I this nervous?